On This Date in 1998

I’m using a different approach in this letter. These “news reports” are written in the third person, as if I’m some unbiased observer.

Andy & Eddie Headline News 

“Missing” Son Worries Forgetful Father
Middleton resident and library director Paul Nelson returned home with his younger son Eddie late Thursday afternoon. He was puzzled to find the house dark. He expected that his older son would be home from school.

Figuring that his son was at a friend’s house, Nelson didn’t make any immediate efforts to locate his son’s whereabouts. He unloaded seven bags of groceries from the car and then proceeded to fix Eddie something to eat before the boy’s 6:15 Cub Scout meeting.

“In spite of the fact that the cupboards were replenished with food,” Nelson said in a conversation with his wife later that evening, “Eddie still settled for a peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwich. But then I, too, fixed something I eat almost every day – a turkey-and-cheese sandwich.”

As six o’clock approached, Nelson started to become increasingly worried. His worry then started to transform itself into anger.

“Andy is going to be grounded big time,” he barked. The comment was made in Eddie’s presence but not specifically addressed to him. “If he thinks he can still have a sleepover at Tim’s house this weekend, he is sadly mistaken.”

Nelson had checked voice mail, hoping to be reassured by the sound of Andy’s voice, but there were no messages waiting to be played. The phone rang twice between quarter of six and six. Both times the slight pause after his saying “Hello” told Nelson that is was only another pesky telemarketer. He stayed on the line just in case.

“Is Miss JoAnna Marie there?” the first voice, a woman’s’, asked.

“No one here by that name,” Nelson answered sharply and slapped the phone back into its cradle.

“Is Mr. Nelson there?” asked a young man’s voice ten minutes later.

“No,” he lied and abruptly cut the connection.

The phone rang again five minutes later.

This time it better be Andy, Nelson thought.

It was.

“Andy, where are you?” his dad asked, wavering between a reprimand and a plea.

“I’m at bowling,” he answered. “I’m here with Ross Parks and we need a ride home.”

Duh, that’s right, Nelson thought. Andy bowls on Thursday afternoons after school, and usually he’s done at four-thirty or five o’clock.

“What have you been doing the past hour? Why didn’t you call me?” “I called the library. Pat said you went grocery shopping and would pick me up afterwards.”

And, of course, one of Nelson’s staff members at the library wouldn’t assume that his boss would abandon his kid at a bowling alley.

Luckily, Nelson was able to pick up Andy and Ross and drop off Eddie at his Cub Scout meeting by the 6:15 deadline.

Nelson blamed his forgetfulness on a hectic week. He had left the house on Thursday morning at an unusually early time – 6:45 – to attend a city department heads meeting with the newly hired city administrator, Mike Davis. Both boys were still asleep when he left the house.

“I was out of town on Thursday of last week and this week I was much too focused on my own Thursday schedule. I was lucky to remember to pick up Eddie at After School,” he confessed.

(Editor’s note: The following headline is a good example of the use of hyperbole, i.e., extravagant exaggeration.)

Son of Prominent Middleton Couple Involved in Schoolyard Brawl 
Eddie Nelson, Elm Lawn second grader and son of library director Paul Nelson and well-known political operative JoAnna Richard, was involved in a case of inappropriate behavior on the school playground on Thursday. According to an eyewitness account, which was verified in a letter from principle George Mavrolis, Eddie threw a hard plastic paddle mitt at another student and struck him just above the eye.

“It was an accident,” Eddie is reported to have said to his skeptical dad on the drive home from school.

“The other student suffered a cut and swelling. The paddle narrowly missed the eye itself. He came very close to needing stitches,” Marvolis said, indirectly discounting the possibility of this incident being an accident.

This is Eddie’s third infraction of the year. As a result, he will lose all of his recess privileges for an entire week.

When hearing of the news, Ms. Richard put some of the blame on herself.

“I forgot to give him his medicine this morning.”

According to school records, Eddie has been diagnosed with attention deficit disorder and takes methylphenidate twice daily. 

News Extra 

Former Warren Resident Gets Chuckle Out of Rep’s Math Even though he lives almost 700 miles west of here, former Warren resident Paul Nelson, son of the Rev. and Mrs. Carl Nelson, keeps in touch with Warren activities with a subscription to the Times Observer.

“My mom used to clip certain article and picture and enclose them in her letters, but now I can make sure that I don’t miss anything,” he explained.

A recent front-page article about the 75th anniversary of the Allegheny National Forest caught Nelson’s eye. After reading it, Nelson wonders if U.S. Representative John Peterson needs to take a remedial math course. The representative was quoted as saying, “As we celebrate, we need to be diligent that in 100 years, we’re celebrating the 100th anniversary.”

Nelson notes that the 100th anniversary of the Allegheny National Forest will be celebrated in 2023, or 25 year from now.

“I hope Peterson is not on the House Appropriations Committee,” Nelson quipped.

Late-breaking news briefs 

City budget proposal includes funds for Sunday hours
Last Tuesday, the City of Middleton finance committee made a final recommendation on the 1999 operating budget. The Middleton common council will vote on the budget at its December 1st meeting following a public hearing.

Included in next year’s budget are funds requested by the Middleton Public Library board to open the library on Sunday from 1 to 5 p.m. The new service is scheduled to begin on March 7 and will be offered during the school year, from the Sunday after Labor Day through the Sunday before Memorial Day weekend.

“I won’t be surprised if these four hours turn out to be the busiest time of the week,” Library Director Paul Nelson predicted. “Participants in a series of focus group discussions the library held last year told us that Sunday hours are the number one service improvement that we could offer. I’m pleased that the city has seen fit to honor this request.”

Middleton schools close for teacher in-service 
Last week all Wisconsin public school students enjoyed a four-day weekend as a result of a two-day state teachers’ conference. This week, students in the Middleton-Cross Plains School District get a bonus: a three-day weekend. Some parents questioned the scheduling of a teacher in-service so close to the annual conference. On the other hand, some families have taken advantage of these two shortened schoolweeks to insert a fall break into their vacation schedule. Some children knew of friends who were out of school for the entire week, spending time in Florida and other warmer regions of the U.S. To add insult to injury, temperatures in Wisconsin rarely climbed above 40 degrees for the past week. Cloudy skies and windy conditions have given the air a wintry chill.

“We now return to our regularly schedule programming….”

On This Date in 1998

JoAnna went to bed at 7 o’clock this evening, a much-deserved early-to-bed time for her. When I returned home from a city finance committee meeting at 6:30, she was swaddled in a blanket, sacked out on the family room couch, not at all in tune with her surroundings. The TV was on for background noise, not for watching. She was out until 4 this morning, celebrating the Democrats’ good fortune and ending up at the Marriott Hotel for Russ Feingold’s acceptance speech at 1:45 a.m. Later Russ treated a small group of his supporters to breakfast at Denny’s.

I stayed up until 12:30 watching the election returns, getting a little nervous as Neumann started slicing away at Feingold’s early lead. Fortunately, all the money that the Republican National Committee poured into Wisconsin was not enough to buy a seat in the Senate – or in the House, for that matter. We were getting flyers in the mail on an almost daily basis on the “issue” of term limits, praising Jo Musser for her stand and exhorting the addressee to call Tammy Baldwin and tell her blah blah blah. I wish now I had saved one of these flyers, because I feel like writing some unknown and certainly disappointed folks a thank-you note – for all the money they wasted, for all the people they got fire dup to go to the polls to vote for the better candidate.

JoAnna went 3 for 3, the Senate Dems taking all three open seats. Jon Erpenbach here, Judy Robson in the Beloit area, and Jim Baumgart in your neck of the woods. The Assembly Dems actually lost 2 seats, thanks to an unfocused, late starting effort by their caucus staff. What a difference it makes when you have some vision and talent and spunk in the caucus director’s chair.

I watched Nightline last night. Ted Koppel’s guests included Orrin Hatch, Barney Frank, and Dick Armey. Hatch was actually somewhat complimentary of the Democrat’s efforts. He talked about the Republicans need to move on and pointed to the Bush brothers successful efforts in reaching out to women and minorities in their campaigns as a future model. Frank didn’t have much to rebut, but he did point out the growing schism within the ranks of the G.O.P. Armey’s appearance provided the perfect illustration of what Frank was describing. Armey acted as though the election had never happened. He said something to the effect, “We just have to hold our noses and proceed with the impeachment proceedings.” He rambled, he made outrageous claims, he contradicted himself, he irgnored Koppel’s efforts to get him focused on the election results. He got himself all worked up, on the verge of a Texas-sized hissy fit. At that moment, he became the ideal poster boy for everything that is wrong with the Republican party, its dishonesty, deceptiveness, and demagoguery. He was petulantly unrepentant for all of the Republican’s recent excesses. He obviously wants Clinton’s ass on a platter, and he wants it now. An earlier commentator on Nightline, a current or former White House staffer whose name I can’t recall, suggested that the Republicans might want to consider a change in leadership. After viewing Armey’s pathetic performance, which had me chuckling smugly from start to finish, I can see his point. What makes people so crabby and vindictive?

At today’s meeting, the finance committee approved a preliminary budget for 1999, which includes the library’s request for Sunday hours. The final hurdle will be a public hearing and council vote on the first Tuesday in December, a pro forma matter. Nobody appeared at least year’s budget hearing, (the only people in the audience were the city department heads), and this year no council member has expressed any reservation about the cost of opening the library on Sunday. We’ll probably be able to initiate this service on March 7. We’ll need the first two months of the year to hire additional staff and reconfigure our work space. I’ll be moving into what is now the conference room. Two other staff members will then share my current office, a move that will free up some much needed space in our staff workroom.

I had to miss Eddie’s teacher conference as a result of my meeting today. Since she wasn’t in a very communicative mood when I returned home, JoAnna gave me only the briefest of reports. I did learn, to my great pleasure, that Eddie has made great strides in the development of his learning and social skills since the beginning of the school year. This positive result is a combination of his special education reading classes, parents who work very closely with him on h is homework assignments every night, and the medication he’s been taking for the past six weeks. Eddie’s reading comprehension improves a little bit each week. What’s even more satisfying is his increased ability to deal with the occasional frustrations that occur when he encounters an unfamiliar or difficult word. This week, for example, I’ve noticed he has a lot of trouble with words that begin with “th”. This. That. There. Think. Thing. Every time he comes across these words, he has to stop and use a “pounding” technique he learned at school to sound out the words. I need to ask his reading teacher why that is. I would think they’d be part of his sight vocabulary by now. At least he doesn’t shut down and give up like he used to do.

I just checked on the boys, 15 minutes before their usual 9 o’clock bedtime. Andy was already asleep, his room dark but his portable stereo groovin’ to the sounds of the Will Smith CD I bought him a couple weeks ago. (He likes falling asleep while listening to music.) Eddie wanted me to tuck him in and turn off his light. I didn’t even have to tell him, “Time for bed.”

I’m looking forward to the remainder of the year. There’s going to be more time for family activities.

On This Date in 1998

Thank God it’s Wednesday! That exclamation will give you an indication of how busy this week has been already. A year ago, JoAnna and I would have been at our wit’s end trying to juggle our schedules, as if we were trying to keep balls and plates and flaming batons in the air at the same time. At least now we can leave the boys on their own, if necessary.

With two weeks left before election day, it’s crunch time for JoAnna. She keeps telling her guys, “You won’t see much of me between now and November 3rd.” Late October is also a hectic time of the year for me with city budget deliberations and preparation for the annual library conference.

Middleton’s personnel committee met on Monday at 5:30, which meant I had to pick up Eddie and bring him to the library since no one was at home. Andy was at football practice. JoAnna had to make a trip to Janesville. I knew Eddie would be hungry so I stopped at the house to fix him a sandwich, grab a container of yogurt and a handful of Oreo cookies. Earlier in the day, I had signed him up for a half hour of computer time so he’d have something to do other than page through books. (Not that he objects to doing that.) He attends a religion class on Monday evenings from 6:30 to 7:30, and St. Bernard’s is only two blocks from the library. Not sure when the committee meeting would end, I asked a staff member to remind Eddie when he needed to leave. She volunteered to give him a ride, since a busy University Avenue separates the library and the church. And, during this time of year, it’s dark by 6:15. As much as I want the boys to develop a sense of independence and responsibility, there are times when the overly protective parent in me takes over.

At 7:15, the library request had still not been discussed. The committee stalled while going through the Public Works part of the agenda. I left the room to call the library from a pay phone in the lobby of city hall and asked Liz if she would pick up Eddie and drive him home. I figured that Andy would be back from football practice by this time.

Fifteen minutes later I was on the way home, very pleased with myself. The personnel committee had approved all of the library’s personnel requests to open the library on Sundays during the school year. Of course, that’s not the final verdict. I still have two more hurdles to jump over: the finance committee and the full council.

I was surprised to find the house dark as I pulled into the driveway. Andy should certainly be home by now, I thought. The phone rang within 5 minutes of my return. I expected to hear Andy’s voice. It was Liz, calling from the library, which momentarily confused me. She and Eddie couldn’t get into the house. I told her (and Eddie) that I’d leave the patio door to the laundry room open. (She had attended our Bastille Day party this year so I figured she knew what I was talking about.) They only tried the two front doors. Eddie did not want to venture into the darkness of the back yard. So I drove to the library to pick up Eddie, swinging by St. Bernard’s to see if Andy had decided to attend his religion class. Last week he attended in his football gear, minus the pads. One of his best buddies is also in the class. For that reason, I don’t think our Lord Jesus was the main draw.

Once Eddie was back home, I decided to check voice mail. Sure enough, there was a message from Andy. “I’m at Riley’s house,” he informed me. I grabbed my car keys and made one final taxi run. Kathy Farrell, one of the football practice carpool parents, had waited to make sure that Andy could get into the house when she dropped him off. Andy tried the two front doors, both locked of course, and he, too, was afraid of the dark. We leave the back door open so he doesn’t have to worry about keeping track of a house key. He usually forgets to bring it to school with him and has been known to misplace a key every once in awhile. (What was that remark about developing responsibility?) Anyway, when Andy found himself locked out, Riley invited him over to his house.

At 8:30, I tried to get Eddie to focus on his homework. Each week he receives a sheet with 6-8 vocabulary words and 12-15 sentences from his special reading teacher. Each night he is supposed to review this assignment for 15 minutes. After an unusually hectic day, Eddie was unable to focus and became a little ornery. I knew if I pushed the issue, I might observe a full-blown tantrum. We found some time Tuesday morning during breakfast.

Tuesday’s finance committee meeting was scheduled at a time when I was supposed to be driving Andy to Cross Plains for a “non-conference” football game, the St. Francis 5th graders against the Middleton 5th graders. With some critical budget requests on the line, I couldn’t miss this meeting. Fortunately, Andy had good news when he called me after school. Kathy Farrell, one of the carpool parents and a teacher’s aide at Elm Lawn, volunteered to pick up Andy at 5:15. I was just about to contact her when Andy called. Whew! I thought. One less thing to worry about.

Since I usually work on Tuesday evenings, JoAnna had already agreed to follow her usual schedule and pick up Eddie. If I hadn’t been saddled with any commitments, though, she would have taken advantage of another opportunity to work late. The finance committee last an hour; I expected that we’d go until 7:00. More good news. Although the committee didn’t take a vote, the preliminary discussion indicates that the library’s two most important capital budget requests (a library materials theft detection system replacement and a divider for the lower level meeting room) will remain intact.

Due to the earlier than anticipated adjournment, I drove to Cross Plains and arrived in time for the kickoff of Andy’s game, his first game under the lights. With his team down 8-0 at halftime, I returned, as planned, to Middleton for the council meeting, since a resolution to exempt the city from the county library tax was on the agenda. Routine business. I didn’t expect any problems, but always like to be in the audience just in case a question arises. I walked into the council chambers five minutes after the start of the meeting. I sat down next to the police chief, who leaned towards me and whispered, “Don’t get too comfortable. We’re almost done.” The council had already voted to approve the county library tax resolution, no questions asked, as the library board had recommended. I could have stayed at Andy’s game, and watched the Orioles go on to a 24-7 defeat. They’re still without a victory, and their last game of the season is this Saturday.

Although JoAnna won’t be home until late tonight, my schedule for today and the rest of the week is a breeze. No more agonizing over how to get the boys from here to there and back home again. I can relax this evening, help Eddie with his homework, then put up my feet and read a book in the solitude of the family room after the boys go to bed. I’ve been able to complete all my conference preparations – board meeting outline on Tuesday, keynote speaker introduction on Wednesday, President’s report for the WLA business meeting on Thursday, and Presidents’ luncheon remarks on Friday – at the library. I keep all my notes and other papers organized in a three-ring binder. I’m ready for business.

We’ll be seeing you soon. Actually the boys and JoAnna will see you sooner. I’ll be in Lake Geneva by the time you arrive on Tuesday. Guess I’ll see you on Friday afternoon. How about if we celebrate my 49th birthday that evening?

By the way, I was very impressed with the Manitowoc Public Library, although I probably would have arranged some of the shelving and displays a little differently. When I first walked along the mezzanine, I was struck by a sense of déjà vu. As far as the interior is concerned, there is a slight resemblance to the older library. I mentioned that to a staff member who had invited me to present the workshop, and she said the same feeling struck her.

JoAnna and I certainly appreciate your willingness to help us out next week. I know the boys are looking forward to Grandma and Grandpa’s visit.

May 15, 1992

1 was enough.

Immediately upon waking, Eddie is calm, then boom!  He shifts gears into a fussy period wherein I imagine myself staying home for a fourth day in a row -- not completely averse to the idea -- watching a couple episodes of Perry Mason.  Eddie eventually settles down enough so that daycare and a return to a normal schedule seems like an option.  Walking into the library, I feel as though I've entered a twilight zone.  My productivity is below average, not helped by the fact that I leave at 3:30.  But it's for a good purpose.  JoAnna and I visit the credit union to see about getting a second mortgage.

On This Day in 1998

It’s the lazy part of a Sunday afternoon, the overcast, dreary conditions making me almost want to hibernate, but I want to feel productive.  Time to “write” a letter then.

To one degree or another, we’ve all been busy this weekend, some more than others.  Andy had his usual basketball practice Friday evening.  JoAnna attended a performance of Eugene O’Neill’s “Long Day’s Journal Into Night” at the Madison Civic Center.  She's attending with the wife of one of her staff members, who wasn't able to get back to Madison in time.   Lance and Sue are good friends of ours.  We watched the recent Super Bowl fiasco at their house, and, for the past two years, they have hosted an all-day Fourth of July wing-ding of a party at their house, which has one of the most spacious back yards within the city limits of Madison.  They live just a block from Warner Park, where the spectacular “Rhythm and Booms” annual fireworks display is staged.

While Mom was out, Eddie worked on one of his extraordinarily detailed drawings, occasionally looking up from his work to watch TV, while I reviewed some journal notes I had written in early 1990.  These jottings reminded me of how much fun, just how precious Andy was when he was a 2 year old.

We were up at our usual weekday time on Saturday.  In fact, the boys were in front of the TV by 6:30.  (Never on a schoolday!)  Half of Andy’s eight basketball games t his season have started at 8:00 a.m.  I guess the coach didn’t have much clout as far as the scheduling was concerned.  The Wildcats, the mascot Andy and his teammates chose, ended their season, soundly beating a team (30-18) that they had defeated by a single point, a real nail-biter, earlier in the season.  Although he scored only two points, Andy played very aggressively.  Last week he played one of his best games, and, naturally, neither JoAnna nor I were there to see (all of) it.  Mom had an out-of-town commitment, and Dad had to drive Eddie to a birthday party at a roller rink, a 20-minute drive from home.  Andy proudly told me after his game that he scored 11 points, grabbed 10 rebounds, and made 5 assists.

“What’s a triple double?” he asked me as we walked to the car.

“Well, Andy, if you would have had 5 more assists, you would have had one,” I answered.

Once we returned home, Andy changed his clothes to get ready for his First Reconciliation.  According to the postcard we had received earlier in the week, the service was scheduled to begin at 10:00.  When we entered the sanctuary at a quarter of, we were surprised to find the priest in the middle of his homily.  We quietly and unobtrusively filed into an empty pew behind everyone else.

“I wonder if there’s a second service at 10,” JoAnna whispered, almost mouthed, to me.

I didn’t think that seemed too likely.

“There’s probably a voice mail message waiting for us at home,” I offered.  Sometimes we forget to check.

Throughout the week, JoAnna had been preparing Andy for this event, giving him a clear idea of what he should say to the priest.

“Father, forgive me, for I have sinned.”  (Why quibble with the original?)

And she shared with him the following specific examples:

·         Lying to my parents.

·         Fighting with my brother.

·         Not doing what my teacher tells me to do.

She continued her prompting right up until our arrival.

“Don’t go into too much detail.  The priest doesn’t have all day,” I teased him as we were driving to the church.

“Dad!”

It was an assembly-line version of confession, as about 40 children waited in two lines waiting for their turns.  As one who grew up as a Lutheran, this service had a very unusual feel.  Lutherans are content to repeat a general “Confession of Sins” each week as part of the church liturgy.  Individual confession is not part of the denomination’s religious practice, with maybe one exception.  I vaguely remember having to confess my sins to my dad prior to the rite of confirmation when I was in 8^th grade.

After the service, JoAnna left for Whitewater where she was to give a presentation on 1^st Congressional district politics.  I forget all the details.  Who?  Why?  Etc.  From there she traveled to New Berlin to attend a political forum at the public library with her State Senate candidate Brian Manthey and his opponent Mary Lazich.  (Good news and bad news.  Thumbs up for Brian.  Mary was stiff as a board.   The New Berlin Public Library doesn’t have Internet access yet.)  The boys and returned home from church for a short interval, Andy immediately picking up the phone to find someone to play with.  It took two phone calls.  He left a message on an answering machine during the first call but was too impatient to wait for a callback.  He always has to keep his social calendar as full as possible.  Once I dropped Andy off at a friend’s house, Eddie and I went to Target to buy a classmate of his a birthday present – and numerous other items, as it turned out.  First of all, I let Eddie use his Christmas check from my Uncle Ed and Aunt Gen in Massachusetts to buy a toy – Beast Wars transformers, three animal characters that have since occupied much of Eddie’s time this weekend.  (Beast Wars is an animated show broadcast on the Fox Kids’ network.)  I took advantage of Target’s amazingly low prices – why do I all of a sudden sound like a TV commercial? – and stocked up on a variety of household and personal goods.  For example, the saline solution in which I store my contact lenses is priced 70 cents less than what I usually pay at our local Walgreen’s, and Walgreen’s has a pretty strong stranglehold on the regional drug store market.  I would have thought their prices would have been more competitive.  (Of course, that’s not what monopolies are all about.)  I found a huge box of Corn Flakes for $1.998.  Eddie picked a slightly smaller box of Chocolate Frosted Flakes for the same price. Gotta make sure the boys have a healthy breakfast!

Once everything was put away and a soup-and-sandwich lunch was digesting in my stomach, I stretched out on the couch in the family room with an unfinished crossword puzzle form Friday’s New York Times, the TV tuned to the NCAA college basketball playoffs.  I watched the Princeton-Michigan State game with great interest, torn between rooting for the Ivy League underdog, wondering if I should feel racist because the starting five players were all white, and a representative from the Big 10.  Once this game concluded, I found myself dozing in and out of a pleasant dreamland.

At 5:30 I started to worry about JoAnna’s return.  We had plans to go out for the evening, the sitter arriving in another hour.  I got myself ready – washed, dressed, and “perfumed” – before the grinding sound of the opening garage door announced Jo’s return shortly after 6:00

We were invited to attend a birthday party for Dorothy and Ted Shannon, both of them turning 80 this year, Dorothy on the 17^th of t his month and Ted in May.  (I’m sure you’ve met them before, either at one of JoAnna’s victory parties or our Bastille Day celebrations.  The Shannons are icons of the state Democratic party.)  The event was held at Otto’s Restaurant, on the west side of Madison, one of the area’s premier dining establishments.  Once we realized the company we were in, we felt extremely honored to be invited.  Among the big names in attendance:  Ed Garvey, Democratic gubernatorial candidate; Rick Phelps, former Dane County Executive and candidate for the 2^nd Congressional District; Attorney General Jim Doyle; Senate President Fred Risser; Senate Majority Leader (and our good friend) Chuck Chvala – in essence, the current elite of the Democratic party leadership.  The part was hosted by the Shannon’s three children, the oldest of whom is my age.  It was held in a large private room on the third floor of a converted cream-brick mansion in which the restaurant is located.  The food was excellent, the wine flowed freely, and consequently, so did the conversation and laughter as the evening progressed.   In fact, at one point, a small group of us marveled at the noise level in the room.  We expected o return home before 10:00, but it was closer to 11:30 by the time we pulled into the driveway. I still had another hour until bedtime, as our sitter, the daughter of a woman who works for JoAnna – we’ve used her in other emergency situations – lives in McFarland, a half-hour’s drive away.  With Middleton High School basketball playoffs this weekend, our usual sitters weren’t available.  JoAnna was sound asleep when I slipped into bed after my hour’s road trip.

JoAnna lectured at St. Bernard’s 11 o’clock service today.  Although feeling a little bit out of sorts from her busy Saturday – and perhaps from a little too much win at the Shannon’s party – she walked to church.  Both boys had “engagements” at 11:30:  Eddie, a birthday party – is there a party e doesn’t get invited to? I wonder – and Andy, his team banquet, using that word in its very loosest sense.   Andy’s event was held at a Rocky Rococo’s restaurant in a large meeting room with a movie-theater-size screen.  The boys and parents watched videos of two of the team’s recent games – both highlight and lowlights – while feasting on pizza.  Andy’s plate was heaped high with four pieces of overcheesed pizza, a serving size that seemed to be fairly typical, as I scanned the room.  Not just the kids, but moms and dads too.  Maybe I wasn’t hungry.  Maybe I wasn’t in the mood for pizza.  I could barely eat the one piece that I had plopped onto my plate.  I used to think that Rocky’s made a really good pizza, but my opinion has been revised after today.  They must daily unload the mozzarella by the truckload.

As I introductorily mentioned, it’s the lazy part of a Sunday afternoon.  JoAnna’s asleep on the couch, well into the second hour of her nap.  Eddie has been moving between his artist’s table in the family room, where he’s working on a war scene (looks like something we’ll have to send to Uncle Albert), and the kitchen, where a bowl of popcorn sits on the table and the TV is tuned to Nickelodeon.  Eddie must remember yesterday’s overheated reprimand about eating popcorn in the family room.  Sometimes Dad gets tired of picking up kernels of debris on the carpet.

Where’s Andy?  Extending his precious playtime.  After the “banquet”, some of the team adjourned to Tony Martinelli’s house for some outdoor activity.  Andy brought along a sled and the appropriate outdoor wear.  He’ll be home in plenty of time to do his homework and practice the cello later today, but perhaps not without some prodding.  When it comes to schoolwork, we really need to crack the whip with Andy. 

Here it is the middle of March and we still have 5-6 inches of snow on the ground.  In fact, right now, a very light snow is falling, probably not enough where I’ll have to pick up the shovel later today.  Once I complete this letter, I need to outline a preliminary itinerary for the upcoming spring-break trip to Pennsylvania.  Packing.  Motel reservations.  Return trip stayover in Chicago.  We’re leaving Mom behind as she is just too busy at work to get away for a week. 

           

Friday, March 6, 1992

Eddie's still feverish, Dad's still flexible.  Eddie's still in a cuddlebunny kind of mood, so I find it's hard to focus on squares.  Whenever he's in a hold-me frame of mind, I adjourn to the TV room and organize the closet.  While I'm at it, I watch Drugstore Cowboy (a movie that the loadie in my can identify with 99%) and The Graduate (still fresh after all these  years).  JoAnna picks up fish at Crandall's for dinner.

Monday, March 2, 1992

Dad's first day of kindergarten

Whiitier School, Great Falls, Montana

From the level of nervousness I was trying to suppress, one would have thought it was my first day at a new preschool.  I'm not really that concerned about Andy's adjustment; after all, we've been talking about this adjustment for the past few weeks.  At first, he's a little hesitant about exploring the room, but Teresa, one of his morning teachers, introduces him to the boys and girls already present.  A number of the children walk up to Andy and talk to him.

When Liz arrives at the library, she marvels, "What a well-adjusted child."

I expected to see some tears this morning, but he was playing with the kids as though he's been there for weeks.  I'm so proud.  I think back to when I was a preschooler in Montana, when I looked forward to change as a new adventure.  Starting kindergarten was an eagerly anticipated event for me and I adjusted effortlessly.  It was simply the next logical thing to do in my young life.

My work day is interrupted twice.  The first time JoAnna calls to ask if I'll bring a fresh change of clothes to Eddie's daycare.  He's had two very messy bowel movements this morning.  A third one will mean time to go home.  Jill calls me at 11:45 with that news, so I get to spend the afternoon at home.  Eddie still can't walk; his right ankle is still tender, so I basically plop him down and don't worry about him getting into mischief.  Actually, we play on the bed and then he naps for most of the afternoon.  I spend my time on the computer.

Sunday, February 2, 1992

The weather is unseasonably mild; we seem to have leapt six weeks into the year.  I look forward to a walk with the boys, but Eddie takes a long nap, nearly three hours.  By the time he's up, I have to leave the house for Jim Barber's memorial service.  A phone call from the police tightens my schedule.  The dispatcher received an intrusion alarm.  One of the front doors was left unlocked, I conclude to myself. That's turns out to be the case.

When I arrive at the First Unitarian Church, I can't notice but how full the parking lot is.  The service for Jim is very touching.  I feel a lot, not getting to know a very special person.  During an unexpected recessional, I choke on a hairball of emotion while giving Gale a hug of greeting.  I immediately feel a little silly but later on realize just how true the emotion was.  Before I leave the reception, I try to work my way back to Gale, just to exchange a few words, but there are too many other people who want to greet her and express their sympathies.  I end up talking at length with Ellen Lindgren and Margie Marion.

On the way home, I stop at Office Depot on Whitney Way to pick up some computer supplies.

Saturday, January 25, 1992

JoAnna leave for Portage around 10.  I plan to go grocery shopping in the morning but need to walk around a fussy Eddie guy.  He has another ear infection, and this time the antibiotic seems to be taking longer to kick in.  As it turns out, I'm not able to get out of the house until after JoAnna returns home.  Then Andy and I go to Cub Foods.  That's pretty much the highlight of the day   I start to feel the need to do something special with Andy.  I also need to do something to shake these winter blahs.

Wednesday, January 15, 1992

I laze around this afternoon, not getting much done as I drift into a deep reverie listening to Getz-Gilberto and reading the liner notes from Del Shannon's greatest hits CD.   One of the last paragraphs hits me full in the face.  I'd forgotten that he committed suicide 2 years ago.  While taping selected songs off the disk, I am especially impressed with "Stranger in Town".  It practically screams for a movie treatment, even in 1992.

This morning I took Eddie to the doctor and -- guess what?! -- he didn't have chickenpox.  Dr. Ellis is quite sure how to diagnose the rash.  It could be a viral infection, an allergy.  Even though Eddie now has the green light to go back to daycare, I decide to stay home.

Thursday, December 12, 1991

I drive Andy to daycare, then make an appearance at the library before attending the RFP Committee meeting at Monona.  On the drive back to Middleton, I reconsider my hunger for music tapes and wonder if a diet of books on tape would be more nourishing.

I take Eddie to the doctor -- the little guy's in great shape -- and then make another brief appearance at the library, a questionable one since I don't have to do anything.

Andy's a little bit moody on the drive home.  He gets upset when I tell him I threw away the baggy of Turtle cookies.

He's fine during our half-hour wait for a table at Red Lobster, then starts to act up again shortly after we are seated.  Eddie, too, is getting fussy as it is way past his usual dinnertime.  I'm on the verge of leaving, but then we all settle into a pleasingly calm evening together.  I still can't find that much to say to Barb.  I'm certainly not going to tell her how ecstatic I will be once she is on an airplane for home.

Andy and I attempt to reprise our previous evening of fun, but without the spontaneity, it doesn't reach the level of a very special shared time.

November 2, 1991

Shouldn't we wash the sheets today?" I asked JoAnna as we're about the make the bed.

"No, let's wait til tomorrow," she responds suggestively.

While she goes shopping and while she and Andy are at David's birthday party, I watch Eddie and do some more taping.  Today I concentrate on the early to mid seventies.

At 3, JoAnna and I attend the wedding of two people I barely know.  The reception is at the Holiday Inn Middleton, and we basically just make an appearance   JoAnna suggests we go out to dinner, a late celebration of my birthday actually.  We splurge and enjoy and superb meal at Peppino's, our first visit there in 5 years.

And it's a good thing we didn't change the sheets.  We experience a mutually satisfying romp.

September 5, 1991

JoAnna leaves for work early.  I drive Andy to daycare, then begin to work on the list of 15 chores I have assigned to myself.  Laundry.  It's a nice enough day to hang a lot of stuff on the line.  The garage.  I begin a tidying up process that will continue into the weekend.  Closets.  I collect all the unused wire hangers and stuff them into a plastic bag and then designate some of my wardrobe items for rummage.

When Eddie wakes up from his morning nap and decides that he's not ready for lunch, I take him to the library to see how many Beatles CDs are waiting to be checked out.  Eddie's not in a particularly friendly mood.  He allows Sharon to hold him for awhile, but his face slowly turns from a show of contentment to perplexity to anguish.

I'm halfway to JoAnna's office when I realize I've forgotten to bring along the bank statements and bills.  I turn around to retrieve them.  When I present them to her, she determines that she can deal with our household budget at a later time.

It's quite an afternoon for Eddie.  He gathers up compliments effortlessly.  As we are walking along East Mifflin, a woman walks up to us and effuses, "What a doll!"  Obviously, she is not talking about me.  On the afternoon visit to Mom's eighth-floor office (the one without the spectacular view of the east side of Madison as offered by ceiling-to-floor windows) two women in the elevator go absolutely ga-ga over Eddie.  At Coyle, where I sign our carpet contract, a woman compliments Eddie on his "killer eyes".

I drop off Baby Studly at home and then do some shopping:  Prangeway, Apollo, Cub Foods.  I can't find the postcard protectors I need to store my travel notes.

Back home, I am soon confronted with an inconsolable Eddie guy.  I have to hug him to my chest to keep him quiet, but that keeps me from preparing supper.  I lay him in the playpen and he fusses a while longer.  It takes him a half hour to regain his usual sunny disposition.

Supper is great.  Pork chops and sauerkraut, steamed red potatoes and green beans.   JoAnna cleans up and I watch the boys in the TV room.  JoAnna offers Barb our bedroom to watch the U.S. Open tennis tournament, so now I feel like a prisoner in my own home.  I don't want to join Barb because her bursts of applause sound like a game of Patty Cake on amphetamines.

Once Eddie's in bed and Andy's absorbed in a second viewing of his newest video, I crawl into the lower bunk and try too hard to fall asleep.

July 30, 1991

My first thought is to go into work early, maybe take part of the afternoon off, enough to take in a movie.  Instead, I stay home and do some taping, still building to achieve the ideal audiocassette library.  DAT?  I have too much invested in the present tape format.  Day 2 after vacation continues a productivity binge started yesterday.  Long-range plan revisions flow out of my brain.

I take a 4:30 to 5:30 dinner break, early, too early to see Andy, but I get to interact with the little Eddie guy.  After work, the evening reference desk shift, I'm surprised to find that JoAnna and Eddie are out.  

July 23, 1991

I'm up early and leave the house by 7:30, stopping at the library to see if there's anything of interest on my desk.  It does seem that the library is in unusual disarray.  Monday must have been a killer circ day.

I eat breakfast -- French toast, no appetite for eggs and potatoes -- at Olde Town Inn, then get my hair cut.  I spend the rest of the morning doing yard work:  trimming the shrubs and mulching a weedy area under the forsythia.  After feeding Eddie lunch, I spend nearly two hours on the bedroom floor with him, oftentimes content to watch him interact with anything he comes in contact with.  He's so animated and alert.

Once he takes a nap, I think about taking a bike ride, but only get as far as washing the bike.  When Eddie wakes up, we play on the hammock until JoAnna and Andy return home.  We go to Nautigal for supper, then after dropping off, the Club for volleyball, my first team appearance.  I play terribly but then so does everyone else on the team.  Self-fulfilling prophecy?  Where is my reserve of self-esteem?

July 22, 1991

The heat wave continues into my first official day of vacation.  Already I've having mixed feelings. Shouldn't I have more exciting things to do planned?  I settle for a domestic approach to life.  I take Eddie to the doctor to have his ears checked.  The infection is gone but a little fluid remains.  The plumber arrives during the early afternoon to fix the bathroom faucet, after a year of drips.  It's too hot and I'm too lazy for a bike ride so I go shopping instead.  I find some frames for my magazine advertisements.  Until JoAnna and Andy get home, I continue my 1968 taping.  We go out to Pizza Hut for supper.  Cool weather arrives during the night.

July 18, 1991

I wake up feeling the same as yesterday.  I make my phone calls to let people know of my condition, then immediately note an improvement in my condition.  I take a shower, put in my eyes, but decide not to get dressed.  My burst of energy is short-lived, and I don't want to risk a relapse.

I sleep until 11:30 and am a bit horrified to discover my left hand is numb when I wake up.  A good shake brings back the feeling.

During the afternoon, I play with Eddie for a little bit but mostly lounge along in my room, watching TV and reading issues of the Village Voice.  At one point, I experience the day's second burst of energy.  I water the flower in the back yard.  JoAnna takes the boys so I can continue my peaceful recuperation.

June 24, 1991

I lounge in bed with Eddie.  He's so happy, so playful; it's such an ideal way to start the day.

It's a routine day at work -- and an extremely busy one.

After supper, we all go out to play miniature golf.  It's going to take Andy a few more times to get the hang of it, but we have fun until just after the 18th hole.  Andy wants to do the other course and throws a tantrum when I tell him we're done.  So much for going out for ice cream. I drive home in relative silence.  Andy is sent to his room once we return home.  I try to reason with him, explain why I find his behavior so offensive.  He seems to understand.  Eddie and I walk to the drug store to pick up odds and ends.

May 31, 1991

I walk to work, not having any taxi service to deal with today.  I surprise myself during the morning by making progress on the goals and objectives sections of the long-range plan, only to imagine how cruelly the board will dissect them.

While JoAnna and Eddie go to her softball game, Eddie and I go grocery shopping.  My little guy's an angel.  Once the groceries are put away, it's TV time.

April 29, 1991

My new organizational approach to work is working well.  By the end of the day, I had erased everything on my list.  I leave the library at quarter of 3 to pick up Eddie at home and take him to the doctor.  Time for his 4 month physical.  We have a long wait before Dr. Ellis can see us and, after being an angel for longer than I could have hoped for, he starts to fuss.  Before I have much of a chance to comfort him, he falls asleep.  He's alert and pleasant for Dr. Ellis and cries only briefly after his shots.  We pick up Andy at daycare.  Mom's in Milwaukee for a fundraiser.